Saturday, February 17, 2007

A teacher...and a multi-tasker

What a wonderful two weeks the fortnight have been. The release of the O level results, the start of the Under 17 competition, the training, the work, somehow or rather, the dichotomous feeling that I'm having, of both an high, and a low, is somewhat like a mental 'aphrosidiac' of sorts. Feeling dissapointed...again, that my class have obtained results that somehow or rather is not reflective of their ability, but on the other, feeling that 'sick' feeling that somehow, some of them truly deserve them! Ah, maybe, hopefully, they realise the importance of all the values that I am trying to inbibe in them, albeit a little late! Just maybe, maybe, they begin to realise just how fortunate they are, to be handed opportunities on a silver platter, and to be able to make decisions, though at times, suspect, but nevertheless the very fact that they ARE given a lot more options, somehow 'sickens' me; sickening because the worse thing about not knowing what to do, is just to whine away and ponder their choices, and NOT knowing how to go about resolving their 'not knowing what to do'-state!

Valentine's was a mere 4 days ago, and I got a card from one of them. Cheesy I might say: The card says, 'Thanks from the bottom of my heart, but my heart has no bottom!' SUPER-DUPER CHEESY don't you think! If only this realisation were to come up a little earlier, wouldn't it be much much better. On reflection, I do hope that my kids would just realise their folly, albeit the hard way, and start to move on from here, as the song goes in my previous entry.

I accompanied my boys on 3rd match yesterday. And just before the match, I do have a discussion with one of my colleagues, on the things that I did for the CCA. Without missing a beat, I told him that my co-manager and myself are all things rolled into one: a manager, cousellor, massager, sprayer, first-aider, photographer, score-keeper, administrator, bus-booker, ball-keeper, store-checker, store-keeper, water-boy, time-keeper...hmm and the list goes on, must I say them all. But hey, like what I told myself at times, better this than dealing with all those insinuations and others that somehow or rather, is more pervasive these past 2 weeks. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, if I could just silence my critics. But then again, in the words of Bruce Lee:

"I'm not here to live up to YOUR expectations;

and neither are you here to live up to MINE"